Nighttime Personalities Target Trump's New 'Gold Card' Visa Program

Late-night's top comedians used the airtime criticizing ex-President Donald Trump's recently unveiled visa program, called the "golden visa," describing it as a blatant cash-for-residency system for the rich.

Stephen Colbert's Pointed Spin

Opening his program, Stephen Colbert presented a satirical Christmas tune directed at the president. "He is compiling a list, checking it twice, before giving that list to the officials at ICE," he intoned. "Donald Trump ... spoils everything he comes into contact with."

The focus was the controversial initiative that allows foreign citizens to buy U.S. legal status for a sum of one million dollars, with a "top-tier" version for $5 million. An official page guarantees processing "in record time."

"A brief message here to rich immigrants: before you fork over the cash, maybe think about Canada?" Colbert remarked.

He pointed out that the scheme is also intended to "squeeze cash" from companies looking to hire foreign workers, with significant costs. "That's a lot of fees, but if you enroll, you also get free accommodation at a hotel of your choice – provided that it's the a specific Marriott," he added.

"The best screening the government has before done," remarked Commerce Secretary Howard Lutnick, "a $15,000 vetting to verify these applicants truly are eligible to be in America."

"That's important, you have to prove you're qualified to be an American," Colbert deadpanned. "First question: how many hamburgers would you eat for a free T-shirt?"

Jimmy Kimmel's Scathing Roast

On his own show, Jimmy Kimmel referred to the visa program the "U.S. Access Express Card."

"This is a card that will permit wealthy international individuals to live here," he said. "For a million bucks, you get official resident status, you get a pathway to citizenship, and a presidential pardon for one major crime of your choice."

"Perhaps it's time to revise that message on the Statue of Liberty – forget about your poor masses. Hand over a million bucks, you're in!" he joked.

Kimmel lampooned the simplicity of the application, noting it is "harder to start a Wordle account." He remarked that Trump "thinks citizenship is something you can sell, like a condo."

"Exactly, the finest people are the rich people," Kimmel said. "It's what Jesus constantly said! It's in the Bible. He says it's easier for a camel to go through the eye of a needle provided that you pay the needle a million dollars."

Seth Meyers discussing Economic Concerns

Meanwhile, Seth Meyers focused on Trump's slipping poll ratings during economic anxiety. "The public gave Donald Trump a second term because they were angry about the economy," he explained.

Recently, in a attempt to address prices, Trump held a press conference in front of a array of food items, and behaved strangely to some cereal.

"What a nice job, I think I'm going to take a few of them back to my home and have a lot of fun," Trump stated. "Like the Cheerios, I haven't had Cheerios in a while."

"Trump is so incredibly weird," Meyers responded. "What do you mean, you're going to take them home to your cottage to have a lot of fun with them? What's the plan with those Cheerios?"

Meyers finished by targeting right-leaning news arguments of Trump's economic performance. "Perhaps rather than voicing concerns, you should give him a sparkling trophy similar to the one FIFA did," he joked.